A friend recently wrote “hey, if we haven’t figured out our lives by 40, it’s still not over!” in response to an article discussing the differences between early bloomers and late bloomers.
I wrote back that it’s definitely not over. At 40, I had decided I was hopelessly single, and threw myself a big birthday party instead of the wedding I would never have. I had burned out at Google a couple years before and was barely starting to figure out my new Chief of Staff job. I was in marginal physical shape, but had started biking that spring.
A year later, at 41, I was in the best shape of my life, doing 100+ mile bike races, running my first (and only) marathon, and getting promoted as Chief of Staff after figuring out how to shine in that role.
A year later, I met my now wife. We now have two kids together.
A couple years after that, I transitioned into executive coaching, a job that energizes me every day while letting me keep flexible working hours so I can be present for my family.
I just turned 50, and I feel like my life is better in many ways than it was ten years ago when I was 40. I have deeper and more connected relationships, both with my family and with friends and peers. I am re-investing in my health again, now focusing on strength and stability so I can be healthy and active as my kids grow up.
In some ways, I was an early bloomer on the academic fast track, going to MIT and Stanford, but I flamed out because I didn’t actually love physics enough to get good at it – my intrinsic motivation wasn’t there. Then I wandered for a couple decades as an unrepentant generalist, but now have a chance to become a late bloomer as I lean into what energizes me as I integrate all of the varied experiences I’ve had over the past half-century.
As I tell people all the time, careers are long. Just because you’re “behind” in your 20s doesn’t mean anything. Figure out what energizes you, keep investing in building new skills, and look for jobs and opportunities where your unique combination of skills will be disproportionately valuable. And maybe you will put it all together later in life to become a late bloomer also!