Doing something hard and scary can put things in perspective.
My son skied his first black diamond (expert) run a few weeks ago. He was scared and cautious and took it very slow, but he made it down. The interesting part was that when we went back to the blue (intermediate) runs we had been doing before, he was so much more confident – he skied them much faster than the day before. He commented “Now that I’ve skied the black diamond, the blue runs seems like easy beginner runs!”
I had a similar experience yesterday at the gym. I did one set and decided to add 10 pounds to the bar to push myself. I couldn’t quite complete the set of 5, and needed my spotter to help me on the 5th rep. I tried again the next set, needed help on the last rep. I tried again the next set, and couldn’t even finish the 4th rep. So on my last set, I took the 10 pounds off and went back to the original weight, and the 5 reps were so easy it felt like a warmup set.
In both cases, trying something harder didn’t just serve as a challenge – it brought a new perspective. Things that had seemed hard before now seemed much easier because there was a new comparison point.
As humans, we rarely know where our limits are. We often have limiting beliefs that tell us how much we can handle. And only by trying things beyond our limits do we discover that we can do more than we think we can.
This is where a coach can help. My son wouldn’t have tried the black diamond if I hadn’t told him he could handle it and guided him down the run, but once he did it, his confidence skyrocketed. My trainer at the gym encouraged me to add more weight and then provided the spotting support to keep me safe. Having a trusted voice who can identify opportunities for you to go beyond your self-perceived limits is how those limits expand.
What’s something hard you’ve been avoiding in your life? Perhaps you could find a coach to guide you through trying it and gaining a new perspective.
P.S. I have a few slots open for new coaching clients right now. If you know somebody struggling with a leadership issue, please encourage them to sign up for a free coaching session with me to see how I might be able to help them find a new perspective.