{"id":1385,"date":"2023-04-18T23:14:08","date_gmt":"2023-04-18T23:14:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/uncategorized\/offer-a-choice-2\/"},"modified":"2025-08-22T18:06:41","modified_gmt":"2025-08-22T18:06:41","slug":"offer-a-choice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/uncategorized\/offer-a-choice\/","title":{"rendered":"Offer a choice.<\/a>"},"content":{"rendered":"

Offer a choice. <\/p>\n

One of my friends gave me this advice for parenting toddlers. Ask “Do you want the red shirt or the green shirt?” and let the toddler choose. If you tell them “you’re wearing the red shirt”, it can quickly become a power struggle. A similar trick I’ve learned is not to tell my kid “Stop playing now” because that leads to whining. Instead, I ask “When will you finish playing and put on your pajamas?”; he says “Five minutes” and it gives him “control” of the situation.<\/p>\n

It’s not just toddlers that want control and choices; most adults do too. <\/p>\n

So when somebody asks you to do something, and you say “I can’t”, it can lead to a power struggle and resentment. If you give them choices like “I can get that to you by Friday, or I have this other thing already done that might help immediately, or here’s somebody else that can help”, it leads to a different conversation. <\/p>\n

As a leader, instead of saying “I need this done by Friday”, you could say “When can you have this done?” and if the answer isn’t Friday, you can ask “What could enable it to be done by Friday?” or “How can I help make it happen faster?” Again, offering control or autonomy will lead to more empowered and effective people, and stronger relationships. <\/p>\n

So how can you translate a command into a choice? <\/p>\n

#leadership #coaching #youhaveachoice<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Offer a choice. One of my friends gave me this advice for parenting toddlers. Ask “Do you want the red shirt or the green shirt?” and let the toddler choose. If you tell them “you’re wearing the red shirt”, it can quickly become a power struggle. A similar trick I’ve learned is not to tell…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1385","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1385","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1385"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1385\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4534,"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1385\/revisions\/4534"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1385"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1385"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehrlich.com\/linkedin\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1385"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}